Relationships have always been perceived in a certain way by humans. Since time in history, the status quo is that men should be with women who are younger. In the African setting, most of our parents have a three to five year age gap where in this case our fathers are obviously the older ones. Even in the creation story, Adam was created before Eve. Thinking about it logically, it already gives the impression that Adam was older and Eve was younger even though their ages are not talked about in any Holy Scripture. They could have been the exact same age, who knows? This younger woman-older man dynamic is one that has been debated for some time now. With the growing number in divorce cases and broken relationships all over the world, people have started to question if some of the things they knew about love are wrong. More so when it comes to age. Is it just a number or does it play a crucial role in the dynamics of a relationship? Let’s find out:-
1. Different preferences: The assumption that everybody must fit into this mold is absurd. All human beings have been squashed into one category which is often not the case. Many successful couples involve a younger man-older woman dynamic, same-age couples and others involving people with bigger age gaps than society is used to. What is of importance is that both parties are of legal age and are not being forced into anything. Adults have the right to have personal preferences.
2. Age and maturity don’t always equate: The traditional status quo suggests that the man should be older because he’ll automatically be able to be the solid figure of the relationship. In a utopia type of world, all men would be solid and mature enough to hold their relationships together. Girlfriends and wives would all be able to feel secure, loved and respected for as long as they are with an older man. In reality, some men who are well into their 30’s and 40’s still act childish. In such cases, their younger partners end up holding the weight of the relationship so that it doesn’t fall apart. Because of this, the myth that older men will always be mature is clearly debunked.
3. True couples learn from each other: Older women in relationships with younger men and other unconventional relationships usually have a lot to offer. Men who prefer older women are in agreement that they are more focused in life, more mature and dedicated when it comes to long term relationships. For the women, they end up learning that their partner is not as immature as they thought they were. In short, other dynamics also have their advantages that win many people over. Regardless of who’s older, there is a lot you can learn from each other.
4.The world is changing: The world is constantly changing and becoming more open to new perspectives. With more examples of successful men with their older wives, society is becoming less rigid on its expectations. Famous couples such as Jason Momoa and Lisa Bonet or even Nick Jonas and Priyanka Chopra, have paved the way for unconventional relationships. The world is slowly accepting that the usual dynamics might not be the only way to have a strong relationship.
5. Gender role bias: Society has always had it that the man should be dominant and in charge when it comes to relationships. Based on this bias, the man is expected to be the older one because it’s a symbol for dominance. In developing nations, women have been seen as second-class citizens who should follow the commands of their husbands. Unfortunately, many have used this as an excuse to manipulate and abuse their girlfriends. With the onset of women empowerment, the gender roles have been revised and women are not allowing themselves to be put down. They have awakened and are now vocal about what they expect from their partners which in all truth is only fair.