1.SEX: Yes I said it… When the sex is too early, and too nice… Awe sure, everything else goes on hold and the focus of the relationship is now just on doing. Sex to a growing relationship is like chicken feed to broiler chickens…. It makes the relationship grow very fast without corresponding strength. Sex makes a GMR – Genetically Modified Relationship, early maturing… Instead of thinking about how to make the relationship better, you start thinking of how to make the next sex escapade better. Instead of looking at whether the prospective partner is good for life, you start looking at whether or not they are good in bed. Instead of planning the future together, you start planning sex styles together… As if you are planning on doing a Kamasutra movie.
2. MONEY: It is no wonder scripture says; “the love of money is the root of all evil or maybe even route to all evil”. Money can make you marry an evil person. For instance, when a guy has money, wrong pizza bandits start to make themselves available to him, increasing his chances of marrying a bandit. He stops seeing the well behaved Komboni ladies. In a similar manner, when a lady has money, good guys with low self esteem get scared of her…. And so she only attracts horny courageous chaps with nothing to offer but “vitamin D” and a funny English accent….. Too much money could be a barrier to a great choice of partner. Too much money gives you too much access to wrong chaps… cadres. And if you are not careful, you end up marrying a cadre. By the way, cadres are always up for sale to the highest bidder.
3. CHURCH: You know what? In the secular world, you are allowed to kiss a few frogs before you meet your prince or princess charming. But the church does not tolerate this. If you keep changing partners, the church tags you as immoral. So you are compelled to stick with one wrong choir member chap for fear of being tagged. The chap could be a candidate for heaven yes, but marry them and you will experience early hell. Just because someone can speak in tongues doesn’t mean they know how to speak to a spouse. Also, because you don’t want to disappoint papa, you stay with and end up marrying a wrong but ‘papa approved’ chap… And you will be there complaining to God in private prayers, but still dating to please the church.
4. GOOD LOOKS: Have you seen how super model beautiful chaps skit when you approach them. Because they know they are in high demand, they ignore good people and raise the bar of standards. As such, they miss out on good people. Also, when searching for a partner, beauty is usually a louder attribute which tends to over shadow all the other qualifications… Without noticing even the devil was as beautiful as a bright shining star… Don’t let those hips deceive you, don’t let that six pack cheat you… There is more to marriage than slaying. As soon as you marry, beauty becomes an added advantage.. but the chap you married only has beauty and nothing else to add it to.
5. FAMILY, FRIENDS AND RELATIVES: There is always that one wrong aunty from the village who thinks they know better who you should marry; “no, you can’t marry that tribe…. no you can’t marry someone with such a career, awe ulya umwaume takulinga (that one doesn’t suit you). And before you know it, you are choosing and marrying for your family instead of doing it for yourself. Some of you are in wrong relationships right now because your friends told you that other guy was not cool enough. You have no idea what they meant but you listened to them… And now you are dating and almost marrying a wrong person just because you had no courage to stand your.