June 13, 2021

WAYS TO AVOID SELF IMPOSE MARITAL DELAY

1.    SEX BEFORE MARRIAGE

One of the things that delay marriage is sex before marriage, most people fall into this trap. They get into a relationship before they could even know their partner they have already started having sex. There is noting that delays relationships like sex before marriage. If you give to any person today what is met for tomorrow, he or she may not longer value it. For instance, you get into a university and the school authority decides to give you a first-class while you are still in year one, you may no longer burn night candles for that studies. So many people might even say “let me go and work first and later I will come back and finish my studies” that is what happens to most relationships that started with sex.

A lady sent a letter to me recently, saying “I have been with my husband for nine years and I have two children for him, anytime I tell him to go and pay my bride price he will come up with different excuses, I don’t have money and sometime he will act at doe he had forgotten when money comes. And she was saying; pastor pray for me, what do I do? I told her to ask God for forgiveness and pray until he decides to pay your bride price. If not because of sex before marriage he would have long paid the bride price, even before the children start coming. Matthew 18 said something, that those things which proceed out of the inside are from the heart and they are the one that defies a man.

Fornication has the ability to defy your marital destiny, sex before marriage always has an aftermath conciseness, who so ever does far God enough to commit sin with you today, will not fear God enough to commit auditory against you. Whosoever sins with you will sin against you. I always tell women that encourage their husband to commit a crime, you can be laughing and driving around with big cars today, but you must be ready to share your husband with other women. Cheating is cheating, if your husband could cheat on others to make money, he will cheat on you to get fun. Don’t let any person say’s “I cannot resist you, that is why I am sleeping with you”. In the same way, he cannot resist you, he is also not resisting another person.  

WAYS TO AVOID SEX BEFORE MARRIAGE Guide your thought Avoid environment that brings such feelings Avoid friends that could lour you into it Get enough word of God inside of you Learn to say No Get busy Be discipline  

2.    MATERIALISM

This is the tendency to consider the material position and physical comfort more important than other values. A lot of men and women these days, look for material position when thinking of a life partner, radar than other values that make life enjoyable, I am not saying comfort or material comfort is bad but that should not be your main focus, there is nothing that delays marriage as this very factor. There is no person that is actually poor if they have good values if they have the spirit of persistence if they have diligence if they have faith if they have a vision if they have focus. It only a matter of time, people with this kind of personality will become successful. Please learn to be patient to turn your trash to a treasure. There is a lady I know of she was cutting a young intelligent, God-fearing, focused young man, but the only problem was, he was yet to get a job, and another person showed up that seems to have everything she needed and because her husband to be at that time didn’t have a job, she hunted for the one she look at doe he was rich, and till tomorrow she is still regretting that marriage. And just few months down the line, the guy got a job, got married thereafter and he is so happy with his marriage. The patient has the ability to turn a trash into a treasure

3.UNFAITHFULNESS

A lot of good relationships that could have lead to a good marriage died in the bed of unfaithfulness, nothing destroys trust in a relationship like an unfaithfulness. Trust is the pillar that upholds love, when you have an unfaithful attitude you will destroy your relationship with people and this will lead to marital delay. In 1stkings 20:39B; and he brought a man to man and he said keep this man and in by any mix he be missing, then your life will be for his life or ease I will pay you a talent. At the end of the scripture, that person was actually missing. This scripture is talking about focus, you need to put all your ex in one basket and watch it diligently, double dating is not wisdom but foolishness. Relationship that will end up in marriage is too important to watch with just one eye, unfaithfulness can lead to marital delay in your life.  

4.WRONG ATTITUDE

A lot of people are not married today, because of wrong or poor behavior, attitude is very important when choosing a life partner, Christianity is not the scripture you quote, but the character you display. In other to leave the single market you must learn the right attitude, the right way of dealing with issues, the right way of treating others, learn how to control your anger, learn how to speak with others, stop arguing at everything and everywhere. Somebody once said a wise man says lesser than he knows, but a foolish person says everything he knows in one meeting. Have a right attitude to life himself, always believe things will turn out beautiful for you, never let Satan steal your joy, treat people rightly, never leave anyone the same way you meet them. Even as a growing child, I have always loved helping people, when you meet a new relationship, either the relationship will work or not, it depends on your attitude. The way we behave most times is inherent in us, but we can make a conscious effort to change an attitude that more than one person has complained about. The wrong attitude is one reason that delays marital destiny, you have to carefully deal with it. 

5.LOW SELF-ESTEEM

This is one of the causes of sex before marriage, a lot of people are single today, because of what they think of themselves because you do not believe in yourself that is why you are always looking/waiting for others to tell you your worth. If you don’t believe in yourself, you will be ok in been number two, you will be ok if somebody is defying you, just by promising you that they want to marry you. Nobody will put value in you except you learn to put value in yourself. For you to allow a man that is not married to you to be sleeping with you is lack of self value, if you put value in yourself, you will not allow people to toss you around, you are not a toy, you have to put that in you, you have to believe in yourself, you have to believe in your tomorrow, you have to know you will get married, you don’t have to warm any persons bed before you get married, you don’t have to stoop so low for a married man that you know he will not marry you, to be sleeping with you because of money. What you call yourself is what others will call you. Lack of self-worth will draw people away from you, and it will attract wrong people to you and this could result to delay in marital destiny. You must learn to present yourself well to people around you, never look down on yourself, tell and remind yourself you are valuable, you maker said you are a peculiar person, you are a royal priesthood, you have royalty running in your blood from today begin to see yourself as a princess and a prince. Sleeping with any man that is not your husband, shows how low you see yourself. Its forbidden, it’s a taboo, to see a king’s nakedness or a queen’s nakedness. As from today see yourself as a queen and a king that can not been seen necked by anyone except their spouse.  

How to develop your self esteem.

Discover your purpose on earth: there is nothing that boost your self-esteem like having a sense of vision on earth, like having a sense of purpose on earth, it makes you to feel special ·  

Believe in yourself: never say to yourself what can I archive in life. See yourself the way God sees you: the word of God says you are Gods, he says you are a royal priest hold, he says you are peculiar, begin to meditate on these words until they become part of you.    

Load yourself with enough word of God: Always remind yourself that there is something in you that is not in any other person in this world: you are the only brand of yourself and that should make you feel special, even if a man had the access to all the women in the world, and even if a woman had access to all the men in the world, he or she have not had access to you. You are special, you are peculiar, you are different, your brand is the only you God have created and it’s the only one He will ever create. That should make you feel special.

6. INPATIENT:

Inpatients can lead to marital delay. You need to patiently wait to discover a treasure in any person. Inpatient is another factor why people marry the wrong spouse. The patient is very important to unwrap and discover a treasure in a trash, you are not to look out for an already made wife or husband. You are to work with your wife or husband to make life. This is the deception of Satan over a lot of people, they feel they should be rich and successful before getting married and because they have a delay in marriage and this is one of the reasons that leads to sex before marriage because as a human it gets to a point you start having feelings for the opposite sex.

Early marriage will discourage sex before marriage. Geneses 2:15-22; God created man and put him in the garden of Eden and he gave him commandment concerning what to eat, He gave him an assignment and immediately he brought him a wife to help with the assignment, it’s a man and his wife that will work together, bring intelligent together, bring forces together and become successful together. You are not to make all the money and make all the mark on earth before getting married. You can marry a man or a woman that is really not rich today or even working, that is to say they will be jobless forever. You need to patiently wait and bring out something good out of nothing. Inpatient is the reason why a lot of people are looking for an already made spouse, and that has delayed their marital destiny.

A woman is like an incubator, you have to take what a man has and add life to it. A woman is an enhancer, you have to enhance the value in your man and add colors to his life. A woman is a manager, you have to manage your husband into productivity, manage his potentials and bring out the best in him. If you marry a person that has all you want, who would you become to him? So look for someone you will team up together to become successful not an already made. Looking for an already made will delay your marital destiny.

7.    I AM NOT READY KIND OF LIFESTYLE

I am not yet ready, is why a lot of people are not yet married today. Most older women while growing up, they where lot of men on their case, but they were not ready, now it’s a serious prayer point. They thought they still had time, before they knew it, time had gone. I am not ready kind of lifestyle is one of the cause of self impose marital delay.

By: Pastor Judith Daniel Imagoro

%d bloggers like this: